The Funnies: Stuff my 4-year-old says

I have not did the Funnies in awhile, but believe me it is not because there hasn't been funny stuff going on. 

My 4-year-old always remind me how fairly new I am to parenting. I never thought I would have to explain certain things or at least argue with a person who has only been on Earth for 4 years.

Any-who...this is the

Religion

My 4-year-old told me he wants a baby sister. I told him to ask God for a baby sister. He asks, "How can I ask God for a baby sister?" I said, "You can go to God for anything." He said, "But don't I have to die first before I go to God?" (Blank-stare)  I said, "Ummm, No you don't have to die to go to God." He then says, "Well I don't have God's phone number." 

(You know what? Just never-mind.)

Birds & the Bees

Husband asks 4-year-old, "Where do babies come from?" He says, "Your stomach." Husband says, "So can I have a baby?" He says, "No, only mommies." Husband says, "So how am I your dad?" He says, "Because you just are." Husband says, "Well, I am your dad because I put a magic potion in your mom." (We are such great parents.) 4-year-old says, "There is no such thing as magic." 

(Boom! I literally spit out the water I was drinking. Magic Potion, lol!)

Counting & the Calendar

To my 4-year-old I say, "Today's date is January 30th." He says, "Yes. Then it is January 31, then 32, then 33..." I say, "No dear, it only goes to 31, then another month begins."  He argues, "No mom. After 31 is 32, then 33, 34, 35..." I say, "I know that. But when you are counting days of the month you start over at 31 or sometimes 30. There is no January 32nd." He says, "No mom! 32 always comes after 31." I say, "No sweetie, not pertaining to how many days there are in a month." He says, "Yes it is! That is what my teacher says."

(You know what....never-mind.)

The Process of Aging

My 4 year-old says to me, "When you turn 20, you will die. (Putting a lot of emphasis on the word "die".) I say, "No you won't. I'm 28 and your Nana is 50, and we aren't dead." He thinks for a minute and then says, "Well when you are a zillion, then you will die. (once again putting emphasis on the word "die".)  I say, "Well if you are a zillion, you would have dead for a long time." He says, "Yep!"

Arts & Music

"Mom, you can sing really good!"

(Now, that is funny.)

Reading & Literature

In honor of Dr. Seuss' birthday, my 4-year-old and I read the classic, Green Eggs and Ham. While reading, he asks, "Why is the eggs green? Is it old?" I say, "I don't know, but let's keep reading." After reading the book he says, "I don't like Sam-I-am. He keeps asking the Grinch too many questions."

(Blank-stare. I was't aware that the Grinch was in this book. Wow, learn something everyday.)

This concludes THE STUFF MY 4-YEAR-OLD SAYS edition of the THE FUNNIES!

Hope you laughed as much as I did. 

Happy Monday, beautiful people!

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